Welcome back Sheena and Irina!!!!

Welcome back ladies! Take a rest, it's never easy to get used to different time zone! Waiting for your impressions!

Great to have you back Sheena& Irina!

I feel bad that I haven´t been here for real in a longer time now, but over the last few months, I haven´t felt that well and even when I didn´t want to post it here to bother you with it, I just can´t bear it alone anymore and I need to tell someone, to release a heavy burden I feel on my heart...

I have never been lucky in relationships, in fact I never had a real boyfriend... People can be strong and try to live as if everything was okay, but you can live like that only for a certain time. Especially when you´re getting older, it gets harder and harder... In the past few months, I ´ve been thinking though whether I wasn´t happier when a certain thing didn´t happen to me - I fell in love again....

I don´t really want to go in details but just in short - this guy was first my friend, has become one of my best friends over time, we helped eachother a lot in many ways, and since a few months, I realized he means a lot more to me than "just a friend"... The problem is, I don´t know if he feels the same. There are many moments and many things that tell me that he does, but on the other hand, sometimes he does things that confuse me. I know, you´ll tell me "tell him how you feel and you´ll know for sure", but as they say it´s always easier to say than do that. It seems an easy situation, but trust me , it´s not but as I said, I don´t want to go much in details (but don´t worry, he´s not married, I´m not such a hopeless case )
I don´t really expect anything, I got used to the fact that there is noone telling me "I love you" (not meaning the family and friends now), though I´m not someone who gives up easily. But the whole situation is hurting me a lot inside. I mean, there are days when everything is perfect and wonderful, but then there are days when I feel so lonely and unhappy that I just can´t work or think normally, I just feel bad and unable to hide it...
Today is one of those bad days and I just feel like crying again and the only thing I wish is sleep and forget about everything ...

I´m sorry for this sugary contibution, but I just feel so lonely and upset that I just had to release it, I hope you don´t mind...

Michelle, you does not disturb us, if you need to speak, we are there to Support you etc that it Or in full or forum by MP.
Love is a powerful feeling but Sometimes it is one has One-way sign and it is heartbreaking for the Person who feels this feeling.
Show your Shone back Interest shone without saying to him the famous "I am in love you", IF, to say how he does not feel the same chosen it will avoid you A bigger trouble.

Comment acts you him with you, loving is it?

Michelle wish you all the best on that complicated relationship, I hope and belive that finally he will says what he feel!!! Take care!!!

Oh, Michelle! I know how you feel exactly. I have been a few times in such a situation and unfortunately they never turned out well. There always was a period of time like you describe (with days when everything seems perfect and with days when you just feel like crying) and then there came the hard fact that the boy usually considers me only for a friend or even just a buddy or I dont know how to say it, somebody less than a friend. But one of my platonic loves is still my very best friend (now happily married, they already have a little daughter and will have another baby in a few months) and I still love him so much, but not in the woman-man way of love, but in a person-person way of love and admiration and he feels the same and we cherish our friendship really much.
I guess he had the clue that I would have wanted more than friendship but dealt with this with so much tact and care that our friendship wasnt damaged by this. But I never told him "I love you". I flirted with him, yes, made some comments, but I knew telling him directly about my feelings could ruin everything.
Thats why I advice just like Gislaine, that try to show your feelings but without telling it directly. He will figure out, I guess, LOL. And if he feels the same, he will react. And if he only wants friendship, he will keep the friendship and it is also very worthy thing.
And if you feel like talking about love issues, you can always turn to me, the big relationship guru without any practical experience, LOL.

Btw, ladies, I had a fantastic night yesterday, getting drunk with my editor-in-chief We talked about many things and laughed a lot and it was such a great relax after the tiresome Olympics. Im damned proud of myself because we did such a great job during the Olys, Im proud of my people as well, the editor-in-chief was really satisfied and told it in the big meeting so everybody could hear it, so, it was like WOW. These Olys were "f***** shit" in some ways but these Olys will always remain my first big event in the position of the boss of the sports department and I think I handled it more than well. So it was a reason to celebrate and we celebrated it yesterday in a good way, LOL. So now I feel quite good...

Thank you, girls And your advice Gis and Titi is exactly what´s in my head - I don´t want to ruin the friendship, so I´m not going to tell anything unless he says something. This friendship is just way too prescious for me to lose it. I´ve been in a familiar (yet not so strong emotionally) situation before, and we managed to remain very good friends, so I hope whatever happens here, we will stay best friends as we are now I just know it´s going to take some time to get over it IF it´s not ment to be...

Titi, congrats to your celebration!! I´m glad you had some awesome time after the days when you didn´t feel well Hope there are more such days to come

Big hug from me, Marinka!
I'm not exactly lucky in love either...so I kinda know how you feel...

Speaking of love etc. Recently I've met this guy. It was an instant 'coup de foudre', you know, our eyes met, and it was like a bolt of lightning, when you're so transfixed that you can't breath, let alone look away. He seemed so perfect, and we even had some sort of a date. I remember thinking that it was really bad timing, I was snowed under at work (I had recently accepted an offer for a part-time position at yet another school, which added to my full-time position at a secondary school and one-to-one classes), I was focused on my career and falling in love wasn't really that high on my list of priorities, Come to think of it, I don't think it was on the list at all. Anyway, the moment I saw him I knew that was it. He was all things perfect - handsome, intelligent, not in a nerdy way, but in a really good way, conveniently rich, but doesn't show it off, very manly, but also caring and thoughtful. He made me look at my life differently, suddenly I realised I'd been obsessed with my career, with making more money, and I'd been missing out on so many things. In other words, I totally lost my focus (and 5 kilos, the very first week I prectically couldn't eat), I couldn't think straight. It also made me more beautiful than ever, everyone noticed I was glowing. The point of all the drama is - it all ended very quickly, more quickly than I could ever expect. It just turned out it was bad timing for him, too. I can't even say we broke up, as we'd been out together very few times, but I felt like crying anyway. Now I'm trying to pull myself together, telling myself that it wasn't meant to be, that it was really a blessing in disguise as nothing would stop me from making a really good career etc., to no avail.

Titi, glad you had such a great night. I had one this Friday, too, drinking wine with a Frenchman who lives and works here. It was kind of funny, the way my French improved after just two or three drinks. Not that my French is bad, but usually it takes me painfully long to work out how to put my ideas into words. But yesterday I found myself blabbering non-stop. Now I'm joking that I've just discovered the easiest way of becoming fluent in a language

Mes chers amis, je sais que je ne poste pas beaucoup dans cette partie, mais Mardi et Mercredi 9 et 10 Mars pour moi un grand moment va arriver: je vais passer l'écrit de mes concours afin de devenir admissible pour les oraux et ensuite, si tout se passe bien, pouvoir enfin faire ce que je veux l'année prochaine: devenir professeur d'histoire-géographie.

Je pars confiant et pour tout vous dire un peu excité par le défi qui m'attend. J'espère que tout fonctionnera. Ce qui est sûr c'est que je ne veux pas de regrets alors je vais me donner au maximum et réussir pour arriver à mon rêve.

My dear friends, I know that I do not post in this part a lot, but on Tuesday and Wednesday, 9 and 10 March for me a big moment is going to arrive: I am going to spendthe paper of my competition to become acceptable for orals and then, if everything takes place well, to be finally able to make what I want next year: become a professor of history - geography.
I leave entrusting and to say everything to you a little incited by the challenge which waits for me. I hope that everything will work. What issure it is that I do not want regrets then Igo to give myself at most and to succeed to arrive at my dream.

Good Luck and Cross my Fingers for you Francois !!!!

Rina it's sounds like a novel

Good luck Francois-Xavier - I'm sure you will get the results you have worked for!

Je vais t'envoyer pleins d'ondes positives François-Xavier et merde !

michelle, we all have been through an unrequited ( i know i spelled this wrong. and i remember sheena told me the wright way in vancouver and i forgot ) love. it sucks. oh how it sucks. it's nothing worse than seeing that someone obviously liking you only not being in love with you . i also have spent most of my life wondering what is the best thing to do in this situation and i think titi is right on the money with her advice.

rina, your story realy sounds like a movie. in a way i am happy for you and in a way i am sad. happy because passion in life is always good. passion makes life worth it. i am sad it was such a short lived story. i hope that what you take away from this is just that such passion is out there even if this time around it was not meant to be.

François best of luck to you !!!!

i am also i a crappy, crappy mood.
i think you all know i am unemployed now. it's been a month since i am out of a job. this is not the reason i feel crappy. out of this 4 weeks , 2 weeks i was out of the country. and i believe that i will find a job sometime soon. but what makes me feel crappy is my ex-boss. he did not give me my lst paycheck and all the paper he had to do for me are wrong.
and he told me today that he thinks i am a bad person for wanting my money. because he thinks he was nice to me for giving me the money up until the last paycheck.
i just wanted to shoot him. like seriously, i wish my parents would have been in the mafia or something and i would have had a killer on the payroll.
and because of all this mess i was away from the forum and i am sorry because this is a placce i love.